He is still alive, though he continues to show signs that it won’t be much longer. Sarah and I have been at the hospice house a lot this week, and I think we have been more encouraged by them than they have by us. There have been many tears, but words of praise and gratefulness are consistently coming from their lips. There’s a definite peace from the Lord.
I appreciated Michael’s words as we were leaving the other night: “We know that God is good—He was good yesterday; He’s good today; and He will be good tomorrow. And we know he has a purpose for this. If God wasn’t doing something great, He wouldn’t be doing it.”
His family echoes the same words of faith.
“I am planning to write down all the ways we have been seeing God’s hand providing for us and given us grace,” Laura said.
Mrs. Biegler often plays peaceful hymns on her guitar, and there have been some sweet times of singing. I’m sure the hospice house does not have many families like the Bieglers. The Lord is using them to be a bright shining light right now in this time; please keep upholding them in prayer—and please pray for those who are being touched by their family right now. They would like prayer for the salvation of others who they are interacting with during this time …
Here is Mrs. Biegler’s latest update (from three days ago):
Thank you for praying for Todd and for our family. Thank you for phone calls, texts, emails, cards, food, music, etc., etc. …
We’ve been here for several days. I have lost all sense of time. Somehow, I see by the calendar, we slipped into May. Todd’s pain is able to be managed for the most part, and he spends time hovering between semi-consciousness and deep sleep. Todd is continuing to decline, and continuing to hold on. The doctor thinks his time is very short – yesterday she said yesterday or today. 🙂 A few minutes ago, she said normally hours, but could be a few days because he is so strong. God knows.
God is continuing to make Himself evident. There is pervasive peace that is impossible to explain. The support from the staff, from volunteers, from friends – in such a variety ways – is incredible. God is blessing us with verses, prayers, songs, encouraging words, pictures – via email, texts and delivered in person. Food is abundant and delicious. We are being sustained.
Family and friends were here most of yesterday and several stayed overnight. After Todd had been unconscious most of the day, he had a time of being fairly coherent last night. God orchestrated an unpredictable, unimaginable, unbelievable gift. Our entire family was here gathered around Todd’s bed. We spent about an hour singing, praying, laughing… Todd was awake for the first time all day. He joined in for most of it – and he was hilarious. There were lots of hugs, kisses, good-nights… joy, peace. I can’t begin to explain the specialness of it, but it sure felt a little like heaven.
After everyone left the room, Todd was in extreme pain, and right back to the bloody, leaky, messy place he’s been in for so long. There were some intermittent rough spots overnight and this morning. Now he is heavily medicated to help with pain, and pretty much out of it.
I have come to some conclusions. Pain, disease, suffering, anger, fear – are a huge part of our world. Death stinks. Sin is not worth it. And, yet, we do. I do. I don’t think I go five minutes (and I’m giving myself extreme grace in that estimate) without sinful, selfish thoughts, words or actions. It is our nature. My nature. I hate it. Even in the midst of this terrible, necessary season of Todd’s life, of our family’s life, when it seems like there are so many needs, I find myself thinking, “Hey! What about ME?!” Why God would be so forgiving, so loving, so kind…showering selfish, inadequate me with grace upon grace is beyond my comprehension. And to think, because of His love, He paid the price – eternal death – for our sin; for my sin. He died for us. For me. We are forgiven. I am forgiven. He conquered death and rose again. He rose again and He loves all of us with all our unique gifts and faults; and we are to do the same. I am to do the same. Oh, that I could. sigh…
Thank you for supporting us for so long. We are praying for many blessings on the known and unknown pray-ers who are holding us so tenderly.